Thursday, July 21, 2016

How To Manifest The Right Relationship
Everyone wants a relationship; a partner in crime so to speak but past issues, fear, commitment issues among other wrong ideas block you. You search and search yet to no avail you meet no one that seems right for you. Maybe you see other friends in relationships and often wonder what you might be doing wrong? If this is you, then please read on.

How To Manifest The Right Relationship

Manifesting the right relationship starts with you; your thoughts are so powerful they create your outcome. First and foremost all society rules need tossing out with the trash. Did you ever wonder who made these rules? Does it matter to you to follow them? Has your life been blissful yet? Most likely your answer is a big fat No!

Do you need a relationship manual? Not really. All you need is very simple actually. The recipe for manifesting the best relationship is to love yourself unconditionally first. Release all past issues and traumas by forgiving everybody, letting go of blame, and realizing that you created it in the first place. Be responsible for yourself. The next ingredient is patience; as healing yourself takes time. The last ingredient is following your own heart by letting it be your only guide and then trusting what you receive. Mix these together, in this order, and you will manifest your true love.

You might be wondering who am I and how do I know? I am speaking from my experience of which I will share with you. Life is truly heavenly and magical if you allow it to be.

My life has always been about relationships. Ever since I started school I have been in one. My first relationship was when I was in the first grade! I had a boyfriend for three years. Thereafter I had one relationship after another until I married. After my divorce I had another bunch of relationships one after another. Summing this up, I have had three marriages and continuous relationships until my third divorce.

That was when my guides said, "OK, Maxine, time to analyze and heel yourself first. Ever since 2008, I have not had any relationship until now; the only one meant for me.

Relationships are truly a mirror reflecting you! For instance, I had three marriages with three completely different men! My first husband was 2 years older than me and born in Germany. My second husband was 9 months younger than me, a surfer, outdoorsman, and born in Los Angeles. My third husband was black, from North Carolina, and 24 years younger than myself. Even though they were all completely different, I was the same. My challenge with each of them never changed because I didn't change. If you want to change your outcomes, you must change yourself first because, I repeat, you attract yourself to you! All of them disrespected me because I disrespected myself! All of them lied to me because I was never honest with myself. Are you getting the idea? In between all these marriages I seriously thought I was different but after a while it was obvious that something deeply hidden inside of me still needed healing. I don't care how many relationship books you read, or what you think is true, I am here to enlighten you that you are your own creator and everything that happens to you comes from you.

I am an extremely analytical person which has helped me understand these truths. I practiced my new thoughts while doing internet dating and saw instant results. For example, I truly felt that most men on internet sites were dishonest and only looking for sex. The outcome of that thought was I kept attracting men just like that. We all attract what we believe, no matter what that might be, which proves to us that we are correct in our thinking. When I changed that thought to a positive one, I started attracting respectful men. All the time I was working and healing myself I noticed that all the men I liked were unavailable. When you keep attracting unavailable men/women then the universe is telling you that you are not ready for any committed relationship.

Loving myself unconditionally was a process. There is so much to overcome to make this happen as we have been kept in fear with no understanding of how our universe truly works. We are taught to look up to other people, to envy others, believing we are not pretty enough, young enough, thin enough,and/or worry about other's opinions. Remember this important fact; when others judge you, they truly are judging themselves.

We are taught to care for others more than ourselves. That is so untrue and so many people think they love themselves unconditionally yet continue to put others before themselves. Why? Because you have learned that is being selfish! Remember I will repeat this many times, everyone is a mirror reflection of you. When you love yourself unconditionally in every single way, then you can ONLY attract people who love you unconditionally. There is NO WAY out of this rule. This rule extends to all relationships; friends, co-workers, boyfriends, girlfriends, sisters, brothers, family, etc.

After 8 years of dating, learning, growing, and practicing this new me, I started to notice that everyone I attracted was loving, kind, considerate, and had great relationship potential yet, they were not completely compatible to me. Instead of looking at this as a negative, I saw this as a positive. It was a sign my guides were sending me that the right man would soon arrive. I am a person who is not only psychic but also follow my guidance 100%. We all have guides who speak to us in many ways. My guides were showing me that my real twin flame was close by. I will admit that there were times I felt it would never happen. As soon as my thoughts went down that road, I quickly released them and replaced them with positive affirmations.

6 months ago I was given a complete description of the man I would meet; my true last relationship. At that time I was living in another state. I moved, settled in, and got the intuitive message to go back on a particular dating site. Being completely surprised as I had sworn off all dating sites, yet they insisted. One magical day, my twin, who also was a member on that site, was given the intuitive feeling to go on this site now! He had not visited that site for four months. At that same time he was given the message, I happened to be available to chat. He sent me a message and the rest is history! Now I truly know why no other relationship was right for me. Truth be told, I had to heal myself and so did he. I have never met anyone who was so perfect for me in every way! He is more than a soul mate; he is my twin flame. A twin flame is the other half of yourself who is created the same time you were. Whatever your true heart desires, what you have wanted all your life, your dreams, is your twin flame.

What is the moral of this story? That everything happens for a reason. To always be positive about all occurrences. To love yourself unconditionally first. Must be patient and know that timing is everything. Most importantly to also trust what you receive with no questions asked and release all worries because when the time is right, magic happens.

Spiritual Healer
Published Author
Reiki Practitioner
Animal Healer
Animal communicator

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Monday, July 11, 2016

Relationships: Why Are Some People Only Attracted To People They Can Overshadow?
While some people end up with people who on a similar level, there are others who end up with people who are not. As a result of this, not everyone is going to be drawn to people who are as developed as they are.

Relationships: Why Are Some People Only Attracted To People They Can Overshadow?


When it comes to the former, it could be said that one's relationships are likely to be fulfilling, and this is partly because the other person will be able to challenge them. Another way of looking at this is that each person will be an adult as opposed to one of them being a child and another being a parent.

Now, this doesn't mean that they will be at the same level when it comes to every area of their life, as there are likely to be certain areas where this is not the case. For example, one person could have more money than the other or greater success in their career, for instance.

Emotional Development

However, when it comes to what is taking place within them, there is likely to be less of a difference. The emotional development of one person is like to match up with the emotional development of the other.

There could also be a match when it comes to their intellectual development, but this might not always be the case. This could then mean that one person is more creative than the other.


Along with this, one may prefer more or less attention than someone else, and it could then be said that they are either an extrovert or introvert. Yet even if one does like to spend more time around others, it doesn't mean that they will see themselves as more important or more developed than their partner.

And the same could be said if one finds that their partner needs to spend more time around others. Each person is then able to accept that the other person is different without trying to change them or make out there is something wrong with them.

Complement Each Other

In this sense, each person is there to add to the other person's life, and this will allow them to grow and develop together. In many ways, this could be seen as the ideal scenario as it will be life-affirming.

This doesn't mean that they won't argue or that they won't be conflict; what it means is that they will be together to assist in each other's evolution. When one ends up with people who are not at the same level, their experience is likely to be radically different.

Two Experiences

On one side, one could find that they are fed up with attracting people who are more like their child than their partner. On the other side, one could find that although this causes them to be frustrated from time to time, it is what feels comfortable.

If one has had enough of what is taking place, it could be a sign that they have experienced an inner shift. But if one is happy with how their life is, it could come down to the fact that their level of awareness hasn't changed.

For Example

When one is in this position, they could find that they are typically drown to people who are a lot younger than they are. It will then be normal for one to feel like the other persons parent and they can be used to giving more than they receive.

One could also be attracted to people who are not very developed, and once again they can feel like some kind of teacher. But while they will be giving lots of advice, they are not going to be getting anything in return.


Still, what this will do is allow them to be the person that decides what does and what doesn't happen in the relationship. For instance, through having more money, they will be able to define where they go and where they live.

If they are more intelligent, it will allow them to be right and the other person is likely to look up to them. The feedback that they get from the other is then going to have a positive effect on how they feel about themselves.


So the relationships they have will allow them to experience control and to feel good about themselves, but what they won't do is allow them to grow. The only thing they are likely to do is to allow them to preserve the identity they have formed.

Therefore, although one can look as though they are full of life on the outside, this is not going to match up with what is taking place within them. And until they no longer feel comfortable with this kind of dynamic, it won't be possible for them to truly grow.


If one was to take a look at what is taking place within them at a deeper level, they may find that they don't value themselves, and through being with people who are not at the same level, it stops them from having to face how they feel. One has then created a false-self that allows them to rise above their true feelings.

This could mean that there was a time in their life where they experienced some kind of abuse and neglect, and this then caused them to experience toxic shame. If one was to embrace how they feel they would feel worthless and it would cause them to emotionally collapse, but through disconnecting from what is taking place within them, it will allows them to experience a false sense of superiority.


If one can relate to this and they want to attract someone who is at their level, it might be necessary for them to work with a therapist and/or a support group. This can be a time where one will need to work through the emotional pain that is trapped in their body, among other things.

Prolific writer, author and coach, Oliver JR Cooper hails from England. His insightful commentary and analysis covers all aspects of human transformation; love, partnership, self-love, and inner awareness. With over nine hundred in-depth articles highlighting human psychology and behavior, Oliver offers hope along with his sound advice. Current projects include "A Dialogue With The Heart" and "Communication Made Easy."

To find out more go to -
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How to Show Love - Giving to Those That Which You Wish to Receive
Why don't you turn the tide? Instead of expecting to receive something, be the first one to give. Nothing can compare to the feeling of joy and contentment once you see a person brimming with happiness after he or she receives your gift.

Humans nowadays are too attached to material possessions that they eventually forget to see the real beauty of life. The riches we acquired here on earth are something we cannot bring with us when we die. It is the laughter, the memories we have with each other that makes our existence worthwhile. It is quite saddening that we put too much weight on things that don't even matter.

How to Show Love - Giving to Those That Which You Wish to Receive

We fail to realize the value of things that money can't buy.

Give to those people that which you wish to receive. Don't wait for them to give you something before you can actually show them your love. The Law of Cause and Effect tells us that anything that you send out into the universe will come back to you. You may not know it but you will soon get back the effort that you put out.

Once you give, you get.

If you want to receive love, you have to give love. You can't just continue to take and take. Your selfishness will get you nowhere. Plant great things and you shall harvest what you deserve. It's a cycle. One scenario is when you start being mean towards a person and depending on the gravity of your action, pretty soon that person will also be quite rude to you. If we only learn to start the cycle with kindness, for sure we would've achieved world peace by now.

Start with goodness.

Nothing goes wrong when you start doing something with goodness. If your loved one can't give you flowers on Valentine's Day, be the one to give. Initiate the loving gesture. Besides, the web makes it so much easier for us to grab alluring bouquets through online flowers. Lower down your ego, being the first one to give doesn't make you the lesser person.

Be true and be you.

Do not be a hypocrite and create an illusion that you can afford to give something that you know is beyond your means. You will only slowly destroy yourself in the process. You can never give something that you don't have. Learn to settle with what you are and give what you can. Be honest with yourself. A gift no matter how big or small will be appreciated as long as it genuinely came from you - the real you.

Never expect to receive something from someone. The Law of Cause and Effect does not happen in a blink of an eye, it will come back to you as a surprise. The universe will return anything that we wish to plant. Continue to be positive and give out good vibrations.

Didn't receive anything at all? Be the first one to give. Start out by sending flowers to the person you love.

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Why Do People Really Want to Get Married - Or At Least Be In A Relationship - In Despair?
According to the Bible, God created man who will rule over the rest of His creations. On the sixth day of His Creation of the Earth, He made Adam. But when He found out that Adam is feeling lonely, He first made the animals for him; but still, Adam felt lonely. So God made him fall asleep, pulled one of his ribs, and then created Eve; and finally, Adam felt happy (Genesis 2:18-23).

Such excerpt from the Holy Scriptures tells us that man has a natural longing for a life partner, with its core concepts varying over time and across cultures and subcultures. But some people tend to become desperate in finding for their other halves - hopeless romantics as they say - to the point that their situations become worse than expected.

Going loco over having as spouse, or at least a boyfriend or girlfriend, has its own aspects similar to that of a human being. Whether a certain reason is good or bad depends on the specific aspect it is connected.

Why Do People Really Want to Get Married - Or At Least Be In A Relationship - In Despair?

PHYSICAL ASPECT: Some women regard themselves as "damsels in distress" in need of their "knights in shining armor." In modern talk, these women prefer men of bodyguard material - tall, handsome, mature-looking, and beefy. They think of themselves as Whitney Houston in "The Bodyguard," or Adele herself. In short, these ladies expect for guys willing to be beside them most of the time - if not ALL the time.

Intimate relationships start with two people present in each other's eyes physically or virtually (over the Web). But demanding too much of physical presence to your partner, on the other hand, is not really good for you and your relationship.

MENTAL ASPECT: Whether a person is in a relationship already or not yet, too much longing for someone's physical presence can affect his/her mental health. Aside from physical dependence to his/her partner or relationship prospect, obsession can also occur wherein the person stalks the other and feels threatened to anyone the latter is meeting including immediate family members. In the case of being in a relationship already, the person can also become manipulative in all forms to his/her partner.

EMOTIONAL ASPECT: Hopeless romantics tend to show actions and reactions that cannot be easily explained and justified by themselves. The most common emotional manifestation among them is jealousy - which is somewhat acceptable in some cultures, particularly Latino and Asian, with the belief that it is just a normal thing in any intimate relationship. But the feeling of jealousy by a person of single status for his/her relationship prospect would not be a normal thing on the other hand. Such person tends to attack everyone the other meets with, including immediate family members, face to face, over the phone, and/or even on social media.

The physical, mental, and emotional aspects of desperation towards having a life partner have significant connections with each other. A person who is dependent, obsessed, and feels jealous towards the one he/she "loves" is like a lovebird with no partner. Lovebirds are designed naturally to live in pairs; and in a certain pair, if one bird dies, the other will react negatively with the situation, causing it to die also. Humans are no lovebirds - and should not be - for the earlier have actually their innate abilities to train themselves in living independently and establishing good camaraderie with others; thus good relationships would be formed.

ECONOMIC ASPECT: Wealth sharing is one of the key concepts of marriage - yet it is not an ideal and valid reason to form a marriage or even an intimate relationship. Moreover, wealth should not be the ultimate or even sole criterion for a person to choose his/her life partner.

A person who prefers someone of high socioeconomic stature (e.g. A-list celebrity, politician, high-roller) to be his/her life partner is called a social climber. Lower- to middle-class people engage into social climbing primarily to "climb" themselves up the socioeconomic strata; and relationships formed from social climbing usually have no intimacy involved. Most marriages between two people who both have high socioeconomic statuses also lack in intimacy - the ultimate goal of such marriages is to preserve the wealth and stature of themselves and their families.

SOCIAL ASPECT: The worst part of desperately getting married or being in a relationship lies on its social aspect. Peer pressure is one of the worst factors that contribute to an unhappy marriage or relationship; and its most common form is what we can call as the social deadline. By popular belief, men should get married up to their thirties, and women at their twenties, or else their chances of being single forever will become bigger. Moreover, media has (either unintentionally or deliberately) influenced tweens to enter into intimate relationships as early as their ages - which lead to juvenile pregnancies with some ending up with abortion.

Summing it all up, the biggest reason why some people are desperate to get married or be in a relationship is the need for SECURITY in all aspects. Hopeless romantics tend to become dependent to other people, go frenzy and freak out easily when undesirable things happen, and get driven easily with the "norms" of the world. The best way, according to them, to deal with these issues is to be in an "ideal" relationship and commit themselves to an "ideal" marriage - a not-so-good "idea." Lack of self-security among hopeless romantics means low self-esteem, thus having issues on inferiority.

The ideal way to treat a hopeless romantic is to have him/her realize that he/she is going the wrong path to love - simple solution but not really a piece of cake. As the popular quote goes, "It is very hard to rescue someone who does not really want to get rescued;" so it is best to get some professional help in dealing with this issue.

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Tuesday, July 5, 2016

Healthy Relationship Program - Set Goals and Transform Your Relationship
Imagine your life without goals. That's right: pretend you just wiped away every single goal imaginable--from the mundane sort like getting out of bed and brushing your teeth to the bigger variety, like making partner at the firm. I bet you can't imagine it. Because without goals (the ones you consciously name and the ones you just carry out), our lives might feel like unstructured, amorphous stretches of time. Setting goals can direct, energize and motivate you. And meeting your goals is a tremendously rewarding experience.

Healthy Relationship Program - Set Goals and Transform Your Relationship

Take a moment to jot down three goals that are important to you--things you want to achieve in your life.

Then think about which aspects of your life are most important to you--what you cherish most in life.

If you're anything like the people I recently surveyed, then your goals include things like: making more money while working less, exercising more and losing weight (and keeping it off) and getting out of debt. Money and health topped the goal-setting list.

Then I asked these same individuals for a different type of list--a list of what they cherish most in life. Almost all discussed their relationship with their spouse or life partner. People and relationships topped the what's-most-important-to-you list.

Relationship Goals are MIA:

Here's what I find remarkable. The people I surveyed didn't have any goals for what they cherish most in life--their relationship or marriage. When it comes to goal-setting, marriage is left at the curb. There's a dangerous assumption lurking that a good relationship will take care of itself. The frequency of failed relationships tells us this assumption is dead wrong.

Your Relationship Roadmap: Create a vision

In order to create relationship goals, it's important to have a vision that details the kind of spouse or partner you aspire to be as well as the type of relationship that is important to you and your partner--this picture should be consistent with your personal values. When your goals are out of sync with your values, you'll find yourself stalled on the road to your relationship destination.

A set of relationship goals is a roadmap that lends direction to your relationship. If your relationship already meets your vision, then working to keep the relationship at this level can be your goal.

An exercise to help you create relationship goals:

Imagine that your partner has been hired to teach a class about you at UCLA. The syllabus is a written testament to the type of spouse or partner you've been throughout the history of your relationship. Not holding anything back, s/he will detail your strengths and weaknesses as a partner. The entire truth (as your partner sees it) will be unfurled for an eager audience motivated to learn all about you.

What do you imagine s/he will say about you?

Respond to this question as honestly as possible. If you find yourself resisting this exercise or focusing more on what you'd like your partner to say, you won't establish any meaningful goals. Remember, this exercise is designed to help you take a realistic look at yourself as a partner, a necessary step in creating goals that will make a difference in your relationship or marriage. You will need to open yourself up to some truths that may sting. Take my word--it will be well worth it.

There's relationship gold to be found in the gap:

There will be a gap between what you'd like your partner to convey in his/her lecture and what s/he would actually say. This gap contains valuable information that you'll use to set up relationship goals. Keep in mind that establishing and reaching relationship goals means committing to changing your behavior. The focus should be on you and not what you believe your partner should do differently.

The guiding question is: How wide is this gap and what can you do to narrow it?

When you begin to take steps to answer this question, you start accumulating the information you need to create your relationship goals. Don't rush this--it should be a process that you come back to over and over again.

Ready to discover more about relationship goal-setting and other practical ways to transform your relationship?

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The Secrets to a Happy and Healthy Relationship
If you want to insure that your relationship stays healthy, be aware of what you contribute to it and how you can keep bringing new experiences to exchange with your partner. Following are three concepts you can focus on. They are being strong, committed, and flexible. Let's examine how each of these concepts can help you create your own wonderful relationship. These can be viewed as secrets, but great relationships are really works of love.

The Secrets to a Happy and Healthy Relationship

Having a happy relationship is totally worthwhile if you have strong convictions as to what you want your relationship to be. Being faithful to your mate and not letting anything come between you can be achieved with self-discipline and self-control. Without saying a word, by putting your partner's needs before your own makes a powerful statement.

Strengthening your commitment to each other through mutual responsibility for how your relationship functions is a by-product of not placing blame or finding fault with each other. The value of your relationship continues to increase with trust and appreciation. There are no rules about how that takes place - the main thing is to just tell your mate how much you appreciate what is done for you and is being brought to your union.

Understand the 80/20 rule, which states that a majority of your duties will come from one or the other of you - sometimes you will give 80% of your time to your relationship and your mate will only be able to give 20%. On the other hand, there are times when you will only be able to give the 20% and your partner will be picking up the other 80%. Compromise often, and focus on the critical priorities needed to strengthen your commitment to each other.

Whatever you do, don't forget that humor is a vital component in relationships. Life is a serious set of circumstances - live in the moment and look for the humor in as many life situations as you can. Don't allow your relationship to drown in the misery of dull and boring days without end. Laugh out loud! If you have trouble laughing at yourself, learn how important that one small thing is, and how it can lift a ton of stress from your shoulders.

Take time to recognize the unique characteristics you bring to your relationship and then look at and appreciate those that your partner brings - while they might be in direct line with yours, they may be polar opposites, but in either case, realize you are both contributing to the health and happiness of a relationship of value.

Confucius stated, "Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated." Look at each day and review what was accomplished, focus on how to make tomorrow even better than today. Remain flexible!Although your relationship goals are formed, the path you have to travel to accomplish them never is.

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Stubborn Persistence Keeps You Together: Relationship Lessons From a Cat
Every morning between 4:00 and 4:30 a.m., without fail, my cat Buffy jumps on the bed, intending to wake me up so she can get me to feed her. You may wonder how I know my cat's intentions. Well, animals are great communicators if you know how to tap into what they are telling you.

Stubborn Persistence Keeps You Together: Relationship Lessons From a Cat

When I get up, Buffy runs out of the room and toward the kitchen. Without fail, I close the door so she cannot jump on me and awake me again. Maui, my other cat, remains sleeping contentedly on the bed during this morning ritual. She is not as persistently "food-focused" as Buffy is.

What makes Buffy so persistent, given that every morning is the same thing? She wakes me; I close the door. Every morning. Although I can understand what she wants from me, I do not understand why she doesn't eventually give up. If it were me and I got the same rejection every day for over 18 months, I would be more likely to say, "Forget this; what I need is opposable thumbs so I can get my own food!"

Maui and Buffy are nearing their second birthdays, so I would think they would know the routine by now. My husband Javier feeds them when he gets up, which is fairly early, but not as early as Buffy wants her breakfast.

As she woke me this morning, I realized that there is a lesson here about being persistent in the face of disappointments and rejection. No, I don't mean you should become a stalker if the one you are interested in has given clear and regular signs that s/he does not return your affections.

I like to think of it as staying hopeful even in the face of disappointments. Striving toward the goals, dreams, and visions for your life, despite setbacks and unwanted detours is difficult. It also brings some pretty awesome rewards if you can stay focused.

How persistent are you? How easy is it for you to persist when you cannot see progress at the rate and speed you expect?

What if your relationship with the one you love is feeling heavy and stuck? How persistent are you in working toward resolution? In seeking answers? In maintaining hope that you can work it out?

Please remember that you do not have to figure it all out all alone. That's why I do what I do. I help people who are struggling with their relationships to find their own answers and create the solutions that work for them. I also help you to remain in a state of hope while you seek to define your answers and create a plan of action. I help you stay focused and accountable to what you want to achieve in your relationship goals.

Take this lesson from my cat, Buffy, and maintain that optimism, realizing that you do not have to do it alone.

Find this and many more helpful tips, tools, and recipes for creating a happy relationship in my book, Creating Happily Ever After: A Marriage Manual For What to Do After the Honeymoon is Over at [].
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It's Easy, Not Cheesy to Be Romantic in Your Relationship
Ok you are who you are? Often I am told by couples, that they aren't romantic, don't need to be, often they claim they don't have time or money for romance or really feel silly being romantic with each other. It's a bit cruel but I like to then ask them why are they seeking my services as a relationship coach?

It's Easy, Not Cheesy to Be Romantic in Your Relationship

If being in a relationship is important to them, then why I ask, are they resistant to the thought of showing their partner how much they love them? Secretly, I feel in today's modern society we have all got a little over exposed or even over whelmed with "being romantic" & Hollywood hasn't helped. Take a movie like "Pretty Woman" where the multi millionaire sweeps the girl off her feet with a date starting with jewels, a private jet and the opera. How could we ever match that?

So allow me to put together a few easy and simple romantic tips that will help normal couples get into a habit because ultimately its the habit of being romantic that we want to develop.

Romantic Tip 1. Practice "Even-Day/Odd-Day" Romance:

On even days it's your turn to be romantic, and on odd days it's your partner's turn. It can be as easy as a compliment to your partner or an extra (seven seconds) hug.

Romantic Tip 2. Become Friends with your florist:

Purchase the occasional gift basket, stuffed toy or the old faithful rose petals, Sprinkle them on the bed, bath or corridor. (however please note you are in charge of cleaning them up afterwards too)

Romantic Tip 3. Make your Mealtimes magical. (Yes, even with the kids)

Jazz up the presentation of a special meal? Buy a little hunk of dry ice. place it in a bowl of water on the table. You'll create wondrous, billowing white clouds!

Dress up for dinner at home. Find some italian music and have in playing in the background. (turn the tv off)

Take a walk after dinner: Leisurely stroll through a local park or public garden.

If on a budget - stay in but have dinner-for-two prepared in your home by the best chef in town or go out for Dessert or Coffee afterwards.

Romantic Tip 4. Make a New Year's resolution to be a more creative with romantic, to have more time for romance or to organize the budget to include some romance cash.

Romantic Tip 5. Make romantic plans for your next anniversary, st valentines day, birthdays or your next vacation:

For most women, birthdays are not our favorite day of the year,as we are reminded that we are getting older so gentleman make sure you think of many compliments and reassurance of how beautiful she is to you.

So set a Relationship Goal today to start, with one step at a time, even if you have to set a goal, to do one easy romantic unexpected thing in your relationship this month. Then plan for two the next month.

I guarantee you and your partner will discover, romance and the added benefits are easier and more rewarding than you thought.

Kerre Burley is an international keynote speaker who lives in Hoi An, Vietnam. Kerre is in huge demand as a platform speaker on topics from Relationships, business management to laughter therapy.

Kerre provides a perfect environment for strengthening or rebuilding existing relationships with agreement on creating new relationship beliefs and values, through her Relationship R& R Package Holidays. Coaching & guiding couples in crisis with new strategies, actions and outcomes to solidify a couples bonds, vows and future together.

Kerre also conducts premarital counseling, wedding ceremonies and vow renewal services to couples in Vietnam from around the world. She has been happily married for 20 years to her second husband Peter.

Discover Kerre's secret tips to Romancing & Reconnecting By visiting her website []
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Relationship Goal-Setting: It Isn't Sexy, But It Works
When you think of goal setting, it's not a sexy topic. At first blush, you might not think about goals and your relationship at the same time. However, unless you give attention to your relationship, it will stay the same. We just love that quote defining insanity:

Relationship Goal-Setting: It Isn't Sexy, But It Works

"Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result."

So ask yourself: Has your relationship been "stuck?" Are you going insane? Maybe it's time for you and your partner to start creating some relationship goals.

For example, if you are dating casually, you may have a goal to advance the relationship to exclusivity. If you are in an exclusive relationship, you may have a goal to get engaged, get married or move in together. If you are happily married, you may have a goal to build an extraordinary relationship. If you are unhappily married, you may have a goal of reviving your relationship.

Individual Goals vs. Joint Goals Made Simple

There are two categories of relationship goals:

(1) Individual goals about the relationship, and

(2) Joint goals about the relationship.

Here is an example of each. "I want to become a better listener" is an individual goal. "We will add more play and fun to our relationship by making an extra date night on Wednesdays" is a joint goal. Here's the difference: with the joint relationship goals, both partners must agree to them and participate in them.

Our Goals Setting Process Made Simple

  1. On our own, we write or revise our own individual goals. These individual goals include personal goals and individual relationship goals. These do not need to be agreed upon, and sharing is optional.
  2. Next, we individually write some ideas for joint relationship goals.
  3. We share our joint relationship goals with each other and begin the process of crafting mutually agreeable joint goals. When we both come up with a similar goal, it's easy to meld our individual versions into a common goal. When they don't meld, we discuss them. Some become joint goals, and some get pitched.

For example, Lewis' proposed goal of a scuba diving vacation got nixed when he discovered Diane is not a fan of the underwater world. However, Diane's proposal for working together on a flower garden was happily adopted by Lewis. We never try to coerce each other into adopting a joint goal that we are not both excited about.

Things Not To Forget

We make our goals comprehensive, covering all aspects of our relationship: home, family, work, leisure and finances. We ask two questions that help us create our joint goals:

(1) What do we value in our relationship, and
(2) What do we want to improve in our relationship?

We write down our goals. Why? The kinetic energy of hand writing goals seems to help with the manifestation process. Our goals, whether joint or individual, become clearer and easier to understand when written. Most importantly, we can refer back to our written goals to see how we are doing. This helps us stay committed.

Think Big, Plan Small

We think BIG about our goals so that they excite us. For example, a set of financial goals might include: be debt-free, obtain a vacation home and retire at age 62. However, once we agree on the big goal, we plan the small steps necessary to achieve those goals. These small action steps are things we can achieve in the current year. We love feeling successful and we always celebrate our little wins. We make sure our celebrations are ridiculously fun!

Benefits of Goal Setting

First: We connect to each other as we dream about our future together.

Second: We discover where our dreams are not in alignment and decide how to deal with that without judging or arguing

Third: We create action steps that will ensure our success as a couple.

"Hold an image of the life you want, and that image will become fact" -- Dr. Vincent Norman Peale

The Fun of Sharing Our Individual Goals with Each Other

Although our individual goals don't necessarily have anything to do with our relationship, we can choose to share these with each other. This helps us understand what is important to each other. Intimacy is instantly created. Furthermore, we find ways to help and support each other accomplish our goals. For example, Lewis has a goal to walk 20 minutes each day and Diane has a goal to do two Toastmaster speeches a month. We support each other by scheduling daily walks together during which Diane practices her speeches.

Using a Coach

When you have a coach, you do what you say you're going to do. Why? Because you know that your coach is going to ask you if you followed through. We like to call it "healthy pressure."

Throughout history, kings, presidents, rulers, athletes and actors have used coaches. Today, coaches are used in many areas of life, including relationships.

There is no lack of information about coaching. Suffice it to say that we have used a fabulous coach and now offer relationship coaching to others.

S.M.A.R.T. Goals

Here it is--an oldie but goodie--like business goals, relationship goals should be S.M.A.R.T.: Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic and Timely. The more your goals embody these five characteristics, the more likely you are to achieve them.

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