She and I were discussing relationships on this specific day. She questioned my expectations of a woman. She asked me a question and when I responded she believed the discussion was important to share with others who have trouble maintaining relationships. The following is a sample of the conversation:
What are Your Expectations From a Love Relationship?
Ted: A woman should just offer a man what he wants in an intimate relationship. The relationship will probably succeed if she offers him what he wants.
Linda : And the woman? How about if the male gives her what she desires? Given that no two people are the same, it can be challenging to express what a woman wants from a guy without making him think she wants to run the show.
Ted: The same holds true. He need to just give her what she requests. If people are upfront with one another about what they desire, that works. That implies that you discuss what you hope and expect from a partnership. I can let a lady know whether I can offer her what she wants if she lets me know what it is up front. If I can't, I'd prefer to let her know right away rather than risk her being upset over not getting what she needs. I can say no, I can't offer you that if she informs me. I may also claim that I'm unwilling to offer you that. If I can offer it to her, I'll be aware of what I'm getting into rather than her feeling resentful because she thinks she is meeting my demands while mine are unmet.
Linda: Of course that's effective communication.
Ted: It is, indeed. But a lot of women think that a man should somehow intuitively understand what she wants. She compares his concern to how he always knows what she wants without her ever having to tell him. Women have argued that she shouldn't have to inform him because it is his responsibility to be aware of it. She could think he is not genuinely into her if he doesn't tell her. Alternatively, he may be ignoring her. There is no relationship there. That entails watching children.
At the same time, I've heard women claim they solely desire male sex. They like the man after they get to know him. Then they assert that because there are sentiments involved, the rules have altered. That may be a disaster.
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It's preferable if you don't view the individual as just suitable for sexual activity. You come across as shallow when you do that. Even if you later alter your view, the other person could still think you are shallow. Selling oneself short is a method to present yourself as superficial. It also demonstrates that you have bad judgment. It's not always a good idea to date someone with bad judgment.
Even though I realize that most individuals don't know what they want, admitting it up front has greater impact. Instead, I've observed ladies who are unsure about their wants. But they continue to act as though they do. She is playing trial and error while walking in the dark, which may be exhausting. I could still be interested in you even if you admit that you are unsure of what you want. I'll be aware to be patient. If you give it some thought, you might claim that the majority of individuals have some sense of what they desire. They can be reluctant to ask since they don't think they will succeed.
Linda: So Ted, what do you expect from a woman? Because every woman might be unique based on a wide range of factors, circumstances,... you name it, and it can be the same person with a different tale.
Ted: If I were to sum up what I desire in three words, they would be love, devotion, and recognition.
In requesting acknowledgment, I am expressing my desire to be recognized first as a human being. Honoring me for making a smart contribution is one approach to recognize me as a human. Talking to me about it is necessary. Tell me about yourself and your goals in life. It also necessitates listening. That implies you pay attention to what I have to say without interjecting because you think your opinion should be heard before mine.
Additionally, it necessitates acknowledging my goals. Don't ignore them if you don't comprehend them. Pose inquiries.
Do not rely on outsiders to give you advice on my ambitions, whether it be for your work, your personal life, or your hobbies. Come to me and discuss it. Tell me why you disagree with what I've said if you do. Listen to what I'm saying before you become furious. Being irate or dismissive is not acceptable just because you don't like or understand anything. Recognize my brilliance and get to know how I think. You can't get outside assistance for it. Going to someone else rather than discussing it with me is a technique of avoiding my presence.
I continued by elaborating on my definition of recognition before moving on to talk about love and affection. She obviously thought the dialogue to be quite enlightening.
What do you think? Your opinion would be much appreciated. And I'm open to suggestions.